Books – the best investment I ever made in myself and my future

November 11, 2011 by JD · Comments Off
Filed under: A Year From Now, Act On Your Dream, Advertising, Books, Marketing, Musings, Self-Improvement, Success and Failure 

If I keep buying books at the rate I have for the last month, I’m going to have to build a new wing on the castle to hold my library. Maybe I’ll give the library at the Biltmore House a run for it’s money. (grin)

When I was a computer consultant, I bought, studied, and re-read over 1,000 books and I don’t know how many magazines and white papers. That was before the Internet and it was the only way to keep up with all the changes and developments.

My wishlist for marketing, advertising, motivational, self-improvement, and “building a business” books is growing every day.

I’m mixing it up as I go. I’m trying to re-read a classic book, a theoretical book, and a practical book (and maybe more) all at the same time. (Well not exactly at the same time, but concurrently.)

I find it funny when people review books on Amazon and talk about a book being old, out of date, and no longer relevant. In most cases, I don’t see that, at all.

Sometimes I think someone gets only what they expect out of a book, and when your expectations are higher, some — not all — books reveal more to you, and the more you know, the more that is revealed.

I also believe that cynical, skeptical people never see the gold that is within their reach. It’s right there in front of their eyes, yet they don’t recognize it.

I’m currently re-reading a couple of great books, “The Success System That Never Fails,” by W. Clement Stone and “Scientific Advertising,” by Claude C. Hopkins. Both were written quite a while ago, and I find both of them to be informative, timely, and very useful. I’ve read both of them before, but it’s been over a decade since the last time.

I always keep a copy of Napoleon Hill’s Think and Grow Rich and his huge “Law of Success” books within arm’s reach. Both are bookmarked, dog-eared, underlined, highlighted, and full of my own scribbles. I refer to them all the time.

I recommend Napoleon Hill and W. Clement Stone’s Success through a Positive Mental Attitude. It has made a positive contribution to the lives of thousands of men and women, including me.

I have several ebooks that Ken Evoy wrote, or co-authored, on my desktop and I refer to them all the time. I read everything he writes and learn something almost every time.

I think some people want to find one book, with all the answers, that lays out a simple, easy-to-follow path to success that works for everyone.

To the best of my knowledge, having read a couple of thousand (or more) books, I don’t believe that book exists. I have found, though, that almost every book I read has a part of the puzzle and a few golden nuggets of brilliance.

As with finding real gold in mountains of dirt and rock, you have to do a lot of digging and following the shiny veins that lead to other veins of value.

A skeptic will never believe that it is possible to find the gold. A gullible person will mistake fool’s gold for the real thing. A prospector will find the most likely place to search for gold and then follow where the clues lead him.

I don’t know about you, but, over time, I tend to remember general concepts and forget details. I have to constantly refresh my thoughts and memories in order to stay on track and continue to be motivated at a high level.

Zig Ziglar once said, “People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.”

So, I read motivational books, watch videos, listen to audio, and remind myself that my current situation is not a trap that will hold me forever. It’s up to me to decide where I want to go and how I’m going to get there — and who I’m going to help along the way.

One year ago, I felt horrible. For the last two years, I’ve barely been able to think. I couldn’t work. I could write, and I spent a lot of time on Facebook, writing when I felt like it. I had a couple of surgeries last year and about six months of chemotherapy, and there were days I could not get out of bed.

But, I intended to kick cancer’s butt, and it looks like we did it.

I still don’t remember a lot of what happened last year, but my memory is getting better. I read some of the things I wrote during the last two years and don’t remember writing them. It’s as if I’m reading something written by someone who sounds a lot like me, and it says I wrote it, and I agree with what it said, but I have no memory of doing it.

I’ve made a lot of progress in the last year. I’m alive, I’m getting healthier and stronger, and I’m able to remember what I learn and re-learn.

I’m still on disability and food stamps, but I intend to be off of both of them before I turn 60 on July 1, 2012. That is my number 1 major goal that I’m working towards.

To get there, I’m reading, learning, re-learning, and developing plans for my business and how I can help my clients and readers.

I’ve been evaluating myself and where I want to go. Will I achieve all my goals? I don’t know. I can’t tell the future. I’m sure there will be mis-steps and I’m sure I’ll turn down some wrong paths, but I’ll get back on track and do my best to reach each goal and then set out towards the next one.

Jim Rohn told of the time when he decided he didn’t want to lie to a girl scout, because he didn’t have enough cash to buy any cookies. That was when he started to invest in himself and to develop the skills and the attitude that led to his success.

I found a video where he tells that story:

Learn more from Jim Rohn: The Challenge to Succeed 4-CD Set by Jim Rohn

I listen to quite a few motivational people, some of whom earned fortunes “selling from the stage” by speaking at seminars and events and then motivating people to rush to the back of the room and buy their informational products that helped others lead better lives, as a result of what they learned and how they changed their attitudes and thinking.

People like Jim Rohn, Zig Ziglar, Dr. Maxwell Maltz and Dan Kennedy, and others spent untold hours developing the information they presented.

I come from a working class family. My grandfather on one side drove a trolley and worked in several factories. My grandfather on the other side was a tenant farmer.

My parents worked hard and provided for our family.

I remember one day when I was paving a road in Atlanta in the hot July sun and decided that there had to be more to my future and a better way to live.

That’s the day that I decided to do something about it.

I’d done well in high school, but learned that I did not like Ga. Tech, and quit after a couple of years. Then I worked hard for my living. I never seemed to get anywhere, until the day I decided to change my approach to living.

I was talking to a family friend a few weeks later and he introduced me to Napoleon Hill and gave me his copy of Think and Grow Rich.

It was only a few years later that I started my computer consulting business. Everyone told me it would be impossible. I didn’t have a college degree. I had no family connections. I had no money.

What I had was access to a public library. And, so, I started reading and learning, and planning.

(I think it is interesting that Andrew Carnegie charged Napoleon Hill to investigate the richest people of his time and then to report back on a system that would help others succeed. Mr. Hill spent about 20 years on that project and it resulted in the books I mentioned, and others. It was also Andrew Carnegie who donated the money to start the library where I went to learn how to accomplish what I wanted to do. At the time, that library was very valuable to me, because I had no money to buy the books I wanted to read and no friends who had them. So, I borrowed them from the library, and as I scraped up enough money to afford them, I bought them, and others.)

I was never motivated to earn a fortune, but I enjoyed earning enough to live life on my own terms. I’ve done that for the last 30+ years, mostly. There have been hills and valleys and bumps in the road. There have been obstacles to overcome. It was not a smooth path, but it was the path I chose, doing the things I felt were most important for me and my family.

Now, I’ve hit a new low. It’s the first time I’ve ever been dependent upon someone else to support me since I became an adult. I am happy that disability and food stamps got me past this disease that nearly killed me, but I don’t want to dwell upon it and I will stand on my own two feet and meet each of my goals.

If I have to read a thousand books, visit innumerable websites, learn from hundreds of experts, and invest thousands of dollars — that’s exactly what I’m going to do.

I intend to build a marketing system that works for my clients and I’m going to teach others how to do it, too.

You may be one of those people.

But, I’m not going to give it away.

If you’re a person who wants everything for free and you want it handed to you on a silver platter — you’re in the wrong place.

I intend to help people who are serious about business, and people who already own a brick and mortar business in the real world are the people I want to work with.

They don’t have the time to study and learn how to build a real marketing system, but I do. So, that’s what I’m working on.

In some ways, I’m following in the steps of Ziglar, Rohn, Kennedy, and others. I’m buying their books and studying them.

I subscribe to the Kennedy-Glazer Insider’s Circle and I’m working on reading all the books that Dan Kennedy and Bill Glazer have written.

And, I’m using the knowledge I’ve developed from decades of consulting and marketing my services as a foundation upon which I’ll build my business.

I have no plans to speak at seminars or sell from the stage, but I do intend to sell. I believe that selling is an honorable profession and I enjoy marketing and selling.

So, now I’ve found a way to get paid for doing something I love.

Once again, I’ve blurred the line between work and play and I am looking forward to the next few years with great anticipation.

I honestly don’t know how people can function in our quickly-changing, ever-more-technical world, if they aren’t constantly reading, learning, and re-learning, and adapting the successes of the past in order to find the successes of the future.

Technology has changed a lot. People have changed some, too, but not as much as some people think.

I like money in the bank. It doesn’t drive me the way it does some people, but I like having it available. It increases the options of what I can do.

But, more than money, I intend to be a better, more knowledgeable, more skillful, and more motivated person a year from now.

And even more so a year after that.

As soon as I post this to my blog, I have books and newsletters to study and a big mind map to update as I continue to develop my plans.

The best thing I ever did was to invest in myself. The written word, in books, newsletters, magazines, websites, white papers, reports, and other forms have been doorways to a better life. I am currently reading a half-dozen books and have 11 in the pile next to me that I’ve never read — yet. But, I will. That ought to keep me busy until January.

If you’ve waded through this and you’re still with me, I truly hope you find a way to earn a living from doing something you passionately enjoy. It’s one of the best feelings I’ve ever felt. Not the best, but close to it. (Being loved by someone that I love is a much better feeling, in case you’re wondering.)

At this point, I may be talking only to myself, but if you’re still here, thank you for reading.

Now, I’m going to proof-read this, make any necessary corrections, post it, and then turn my full attention to reading the current Glazer-Kennedy Insider’s Circle newsletter. I can’t wait to see what golden nugget of knowledge I’ll find in it.

If you’re not happy with your life, the power to change it lies within yourself. I’m not promising that it will be easy, but I know it’s possible. I’ve seen too many other people do it.

I’ve done it, myself.

Act on your dream!

JD

PS. If you are an information junkie and are always buying “get rich quick” books and discs, but you never learn from them, stay away from the Glazer-Kennedy Insider’s Circle.

Yes, I’m a member and an affiliate for this and it’s a real gold mine of information for people who are willing to take things slowly, to learn, to study, and then to IMPLEMENT what they learn. If you have the discernment and self-discipline to buy something, learn from it, and put it to work, you will learn a lot by becoming a member. If I had to, I’d give up eating for a few days to keep this subscription active.

If you are the type of spend-thrift who just buys and buys and buys, yet never learns and does, you can spend a lot of money here. These folks are master marketers and you can learn as much from how they market to you as you can from their books, tapes, seminars, and newsletters which explain how they market to you and show how you can do that to find new customers and prospects for your business.

And, yes, I get paid a commission for everything you buy through my link.

So, you would think that I’d want everyone who sees this to join and buy a bunch of stuff, but I don’t.

You read that right. That is NOT what I want.

I’ve seen too many people who waste the opportunities that they find. They buy, buy, buy, but never really commit to selling. They don’t develop the mindset, the systems, the promotions, the offers, and the products that help you build your own business. Somehow, they think that just buying the book or disc will magically impart the wisdom of the ages upon them.

It won’t. Never has. Never will.

So, I don’t want to lead these kinds of people into this marketing system.

Why, because I know you’ll buy. You may buy a lot.

But, when you do nothing with it, you’re going to be angry with me for recommending it and you’re going to be angry with Dan Kennedy and Bill Glazer for spending decades learning what works, and then spending more decades recording it in a number of forms and selling it. And, I assure you, they know how to sell, and sell, and sell.

I don’t want the negative vibes and bad energy that so many unhappy people can create. I don’t need that in my life.

So, if I just described you, please don’t buy anything I recommend, and I’d rather you quit reading what I write.

I want to give my best advice and recommendations to people who are open to making their lives better and who are willing to invest time, energy, creativity, and money into improving themselves and learning new skills, and then polishing those skills by implementing and improving what you have learned.

If you are one of those kinds of people, you have come to the right place.

If you’re not, please leave. Go play with the other people who daydream but don’t invest and build.

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How do you start your day?

August 5, 2011 by JD · 2 Comments
Filed under: Music, Musings, Self-Improvement 

For most of my life, I was a night owl. I’d stay up until 2:00 or later reading or watching TV or doing something creative. Anything but sleeping!

No matter how tired I was in the evening, sometime around 11:00 PM or so, I’d “get my second wind” and then I’d be wide awake for the next few hours. It was always when I was the most creative. People were asleep, the house was quiet, and I could really concentrate on what I wanted to do.

I remember decades of dragging myself out of bed, rushing through breakfast, and fighting traffic to get to work. I was always running late. In fact, when I was teaching college computer courses, I abhored morning classes. When I had my choice, I didn’t schedule a class before 10:00 in the morning, and tried to persuade the powers that be that all computer classes should be taught from midnight until 4:00 AM, because that’s when the best programmers were wide awake. One of my students, who was taking one of the rare early morning classes I taught, started referring to me, even to my face, as “the late Mr. Dilbeck.”

I hated the start of those days. It didn’t matter if I were teaching, programming, or working at a job. I hated early morning and I was always tired. That’s one of the reasons I registered need-sleep.com as my first domain.

So, eventually I changed it. Now, every day is a joyful adventure.

Now, when I get sleepy (afternoon, evening, night), I go to sleep. Sometimes I sleep for an hour or two, sometimes all night. Unless I have an appointment, I never set an alarm. I wake up when I’m rested. Most days, that’s between 4:00 and 5:00 in the (not quite) morning.

Two things helped me change. I got rid of my TV. I no longer feel the need to watch the news and then the Tonight Show, and whatever comes after it. I also threw away my alarm clock. Now I sleep on my own schedule. If I have an important appointment, I set my iPod to alarm two hours before when I have to be there.

Now, most days — almost all of them — I wake up and lie in bed while I think of at least five things (usually more) for which I am grateful. It can be people, things, activities, circumstances, or whatever comes to mind. I take a few minutes and really think about them, picture them in my mind, and immerse myself in being grateful that they are a part of my life.

One person in particular is always the first on my “gratitude list” and then other things just seem to pop into my consciousness. Several of my friends jump onto that list every morning. Often, music is in that list. There are many others that take their place now and then.

So, I lie there and appreciate each of them, in turn.

I find that an “attitude of gratitude” is a much better way to start the day than being tired, rushed, and late.

I almost always wake up several hours before I have to be somewhere or do something, so that gives me time to do what I want.

When I get out of bed, I fire up my computer, launch iTunes, and crank up the music. I dance (still not very well) around the kitchen while I’m making coffee and breakfast, and sing along with the songs.

Those two activities help me start every day on a positive note and help me build my energy so that I feel great when I sit down at the computer and start working.

Of course, I don’t have to face a morning commute or everything that is involved in waking other people up and getting everyone off to where they need to be. I live alone and work at home. Without a doubt, that makes my life much less stressful than it once was.

While I recognize this morning routine won’t work for everyone, it works very well for me.

I’m not trying to persuade you to adopt my habits, I’m just sharing with you.

So, how do you start your day?

Are you satisfied with it — or not?

Why?

Act on your dream!

JD

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Overcoming obstacles and living our dreams

July 31, 2011 by JD · 2 Comments
Filed under: A Year From Now, Act On Your Dream, Music, Musings, Personal, Self-Improvement, Success and Failure, TED Talks 

What is your dream? What are you doing to live it?

It’s a lot easier to think about something we want to do and to imagine doing it than it is to take all the steps to plan how to achieve it and then acting on our dream to make it real.

You already know that, don’t you?

Even when we really want to do something and we have a plan for getting there and we’re taking the proper steps to reach the goal, sometimes we are faced with major obstacles to reaching our dream.

I love music.

I love listening to music and I love playing music. I’ve played guitar for over 40 years and banjo for over 35. I love playing music.

All my life, I’ve wanted to play piano, but I never made it a priority.

I’ve wanted to read music fluently, but I’ve never made it a priority.

If I study a piece of music, I can work out the notes, but it’s a very slow process. I can’t look at it and immediately play it and I can’t look at it and hear the music in my head. I would like to do that.

But, it’s never been a priority. I’ve never made the time for it and put in the work that is required to master it.

Last year, when I realized that the cancer wasn’t going to kill me, and I wasn’t able to work, I spent a lot of time and effort working to learn how to read music and studying music theory. I made some progress.

As I got stronger and my thinking started clearing up, I started moving back into working and music wasn’t as important.

Then, a few months ago, I woke up one morning and couldn’t move my right hand. Not a bit. I thought I’d slept on it wrong and it would be okay if I got up and did my normal activities. Slowly, over time, it’s gotten a lot better. I’ve exercised and stretched it every day, several times each day. Over time, I got to where I could use all my fingers, except for my index finger.

Today, I realized I was typing faster and more accurately than I have since I hurt my hand. So, on a whim, I got out my banjo, put on my fingerpicks, and tried to play a song.

I had to hold my hand a little differently from how I had over the last few decades, and I had to adjust the pick on my index finger, but I found I could hit the right strings.

So, I started playing a song, slowly, as slowly as I did when I was first learning all those years ago.

You know what? I could play my banjo, again.

It wasn’t beautiful music, but it was recognizable and better than I have played in awhile.

It felt wonderful and now I’m inspired to make music a priority, again. Maybe not my number one priority, but pretty close to the top of the list.

So, now, it’s time to get back to learning how to read music and play piano. I will learn music theory and become a proper musician, and I know that will help in playing guitar, banjo, and fiddle, too.

I found a great site to help me learn to read music and play piano: Learn Piano Online at the key-notes Virtual Piano Studio by Albert Frantz.

He is an accomplished classical pianist and I assumed he had learned to play piano as a child, but I learned that isn’t true. He didn’t start learning until he was 17, and that’s considered impossible for anyone who wants to become a classical musician. Most of them start when they’re two or three years old.

He faced other obstacles that slowed down learning to play piano. Among other things, he had his fingers caught in a car door, and later, he broke his left wrist. But, he didn’t let that stop him. He persevered and approached the task from different directions.

Here’s a TEDtalk where he goes into his background and the obstacles he had to overcome to live his dream. I find it fascinating. Maybe you will, too…

This inspires me even more to pursue my goals of learning to read music fluently and to play the piano well.

I’ll never be a concert pianist, because that isn’t something I want to do, but I look forward to playing a variety of songs for my own enjoyment and for sharing with my friends.

I know that you’re facing obstacles as you try to live your dreams, too. We all do.

I truly believe that with dedication and creativity, we can find a path that will lead us to achieving the goals we set for ourselves.

Not every goal is achievable. I’ll never be the fastest runner or compete in pole vaulting or ride the winning horse at the Kentucky Derby. There are many things that are impossible for us, and I don’t care if people disagree with that statement.

But, there are many, many dreams that are not only possible, but perhaps easier to achieve than we may think.

No matter how much you believe you can do something, it may be impossible to achieve, but you never know until you try. But, you have to be realistic, too. The universe will not grant you anything you want just because you want it. You have to work for it. And even if you work for it, some things are still impossible. An easy example? I’m a man. It’s impossible for me to give birth to a child. So, I don’t waste any time wanting to do it or trying to do it. That’s just totally unrealistic. If I were a woman, however, it might be a feasible goal.

On the other hand, I can state categorically with no doubt that you will never achieve your goals if you believe you can’t and don’t even try.

As Albert Frantz points out in this video, one man may dream about being the fastest man on the planet, while another dreams about being able to walk. For the right people, with the right skills and abilities, either dream may be a major achievement.

People face obstacles every day. Sometimes we see them approaching and sometimes they take us totally by surprise. But, we all face obstacles that we must overcome, burst through, go around, tunnel under, or climb over in order to continue on our chosen path to living our dream.

Do you have a dream? Don’t let it go. Work to make it real.

Act on your dream!

JD

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Why do you do what you do?

May 28, 2011 by JD · 1 Comment
Filed under: Self-Improvement, TED Talks 

In this video, Tony Robbins discusses some of the reasons we do what we do, what motivates us, and how we can do it better.

The video is a little over 22 minutes long. If that’s too long for you, move along.

I’ve watched it twice. Now, I’m letting the thoughts percolate and I’ll come back and watch it again.

He brings up some very good thoughts that I really want to explore.

Why DO I do what I do? How can I do it better?

Those are outstanding questions.

Tony Robbins: Why we do what we do, and how we can do it better

One of the points he makes that really came home to me was this: When do we begin to live? When we face death.

I know for a fact that is a true statement — at least for me.

He makes some other very good points that I want to think about and really understand.

Another good one: When we don’t do our best, it’s not because of lack of resources, it’s a lack of resourcefulness. (paraphrased by me)

Act on your dream!

JD

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How do you deal with stress?

April 25, 2011 by JD · 5 Comments
Filed under: Health, Musings, Self-Improvement 

From The Joy Project: Stress is a fact of life, it doesn’t have to be a way of life!

She makes a good point when noting that the meaning of “stress” in common usage has changed over the last 20 years from meaning “stimulation” to “distress.”

This blog post got me to thinking about my own life and how I’ve dealt with stress in the past, and how I deal with it now.

I used to be a real workaholic. Yes, I loved what I did, but I would sometimes bury myself in my work for months at a time. I’d work 100+ hours every week, and would frequently work around the clock for 30 or 40 hours at a time, before sleeping.

I think “bury” is a good word to describe what I was doing. I wasn’t living.

My recent battle with cancer has reminded me that life is a precious gift and living is wonderful. I’m working a bit more than I did for awhile, but I’m never going back to working the hours I used to. I’m not even going to get close to that lifestyle, again.

I’m grateful that I’m getting over the effects of the cancer and chemo and that I’m starting to be able to think more clearly. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be able to think as quickly and clearly as I once did, but I’m making progress in my recovery.

Every day, I take time to be grateful for at least five things before I get out of bed. I take time to listen to the birds, smell the flowers, hug my friends, appreciate my family, and enjoy this gift. I listen to the rain and dance with the lightning.

Lots of things used to stress me out. Now, I find ways to enjoy them, or laugh at them, or at least reduce the level of negativity I associate with them.

My stress levels are way down and my joy levels are much higher.

I did not enjoy nearly dying last year, but it was an important WAKE UP! call.

I didn’t wait until a holiday to get sick. I got so sick that I could do nothing and faced a choice: get better or die. I think my sense of humor played a large role in kicking cancer’s butt and recovering. I know that the support and friendship I received from family, friends, and acquaintances all around the world helped, too.

I sure hope you don’t have to go through anything as dramatic in order to destress your life and find ways to enjoy it more. It isn’t worth giving away your health in order to get more stuff.

So, how do you deal with stress?

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An attitude of gratitude

March 28, 2011 by JD · Comments Off
Filed under: Self-Improvement, Simple Truth 

There are a lot of ways to look out on this wonderful world we share.

Today, I want to talk about gratitude.

I am grateful to be alive and to have all that I need to sustain myself and to do a few of the things I most want to do.

I could look at it differently and say that the last year has been very hard and I still don’t feel very good. I’m too poor to travel the world, buy a new car, and get all the stuff I want.

The truth is, however, that I really am grateful to be alive and getting better. I have all I need and can’t think of anything I don’t have that I really want — except for an iPad and I plan to buy one this year.

Other than that, I’m pretty content with my life and where it’s headed.

I know from personal experience that when I complain, I become a crap magnet.

When I am grateful, happy, and supportive, I get that back, in return.

I understand and freely acknowledge that these statements are not 100% accurate and that there are exceptions. Good things happen to ungrateful people, and bad things happen to people who are grateful for what they have and are.

But for the most part, speaking only about myself and my experiences, I think those statements are more true than false.

I want to share a couple of salient quotes and a short video with you.

“When we choose not to focus on what’s missing from our lives
but are grateful for the abundance that’s present…
we experience heaven on earth.” — Sarah Breathnach

…and…

“Life is not about waiting for the storms to pass…
it’s about learning how to dance in the rain!” — Vivian Greene

So, with those thoughts in mind, sit back, relax, and enjoy this two-minute inspirational movie, Learning to dance in the rain…

Learning to Dance In The Rain Movie

All the best,

JD

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Chris Anderson: How web video powers global innovation

September 19, 2010 by JD · 3 Comments
Filed under: Internet, Musings, Self-Improvement, YouTube 

I enjoy visiting Ted.com on a regular basis, and now that I have a fast broadband connection, I enjoy watching the videos of their Ted Talks.

Today, I watched a presentation by Chris Anderson called How web video powers global innovation.

He gives an interesting and informative presentation on what he calls “Crowd Accelerated Innovation.”

Essentially, this means that we’re all learning at a faster pace because of the use of videos on the Web on sites like YouTube, Facebook, and others. In addition to learning more quickly, we’re also raising the bar on expectations and that means more, and faster, innovation.

I think he’s on to something.

The video is about 19 minutes long and worth the time to watch it.

He makes a very good point about video enabling world-wide face-to-face communications and how we are hard-wired to take in and evaluate all the cues surrounding what someone is saying or doing. If a picture is worth a thousand words, how much more is video worth?

So, what do you think?

Act on your dream!

JD

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Think and Grow Rich test: How do you determine who is helpful and who is harmful?

January 18, 2010 by JD · 2 Comments
Filed under: Books, Self-Improvement, Success and Failure 

My answers to the Think and Grow Rich Self-Assessment Test

Recently, I was reminded of the self-assessment test in Napoleon Hill’s best-selling book, Think and Grow Rich.

There are fifty-four questions in that test, and I’m going to be giving my answers and thoughts on one or two of them as close to daily as I can manage. I may miss a day here or there, but I’m going to follow through until I reach the end of the test.

I’ve started the series of posts with:

Think and Grow Rich self-assessment test

Question Number 41. What criteria do you use to determine who is helpful to you and who is harmful?

I’m not exactly sure where to begin to answer this question.

On a basic level, harmful people are non-supportive, negative, usually destructive, non-tolerant, and block your efforts at improving your life. Much of the time, they tend to view the world in terms of black and white, right and wrong, or other binary systems that don’t let them enjoy a larger view of life. Either you agree with their world view (you’re with them) or you don’t (in which case you’re against them).

Other harmful people may actually want to damage you, your reputation, your safety, and your finances.

There is a huge range of people who may be harmful. I think most of us has a basic understanding of this, but I suspect that few have actually stopped to think about the question and to determine criteria to help you decide who they are.

There are some people, and I’ve had to deal with a few of these in the past, who are bright, cheerful and supportive on the surface, but have a much more negative attitude and agenda underneath that only comes out over time. I’m still not good at spotting these people, but I’m better than I used to be at doing it.

Then there is the “two faced” crowd. These people are friendly and supportive to your face, but they’ll stab you in the back and cause chaos for you when you’re not around. As soon as I identify one of these people, I prune them from my life.

I’m sure there are other harmful people that I haven’t identified. Do you have any thoughts on this?

As far as determining who is helpful to me, that’s a different question and — at least for me — is more difficult to answer.

Someone once told me that I was doing okay if a third of the people who knew me liked me, a third disliked me, and the final third didn’t really care much one way or the other.

I’m not sure if those percentages are accurate and I think they vary for different people.

In my case, I think I’m doing pretty well if 25% like me, 25% dislike me, and the other half don’t really care.

I’d worry and make changes if the number who disliked me was larger than either of the other two groups.

Now, as far as determining who is helpful, let’s think for a moment.

hmmmm.

Obviously, friends who are supportive and care for you are helpful. Customers who buy from you are helpful (but I don’t think of them as the same as supportive friends, although they can be in both categories). People who tell others about you and why they like you are helpful.

I don’t really have a set of criteria for helpful people that matches my harmful people criteria. I wonder why.

I expect helpful people to be honest, supportive, friendly, tolerant, positive, and to have other similar character attributes.

Other than these thoughts, I don’t really have a fixed criteria for determining who is helpful or harmful to me.

One thing I have come to rely upon, however, is a basic gut feeling when I’m around someone for any length of time. If my gut starts churning or feeling bad, then it makes my brain take notice in a way that it never did when I was younger.

What about you?

What criteria do you use to determine who is helpful to you and who is harmful?

Act on your dream!

JD

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Think and Grow Rich test: Is it possible that someone has a negative influence on your mind?

January 18, 2010 by JD · 4 Comments
Filed under: Books, Self-Improvement, Success and Failure 

My answers to the Think and Grow Rich Self-Assessment Test

Recently, I was reminded of the self-assessment test in Napoleon Hill’s best-selling book, Think and Grow Rich.

There are fifty-four questions in that test, and I’m going to be giving my answers and thoughts on one or two of them as close to daily as I can manage. I may miss a day here or there, but I’m going to follow through until I reach the end of the test.

I’ve started the series of posts with:

Think and Grow Rich self-assessment test

Question Number 40. Is it possible that some close friend or associate has a negative influence on your mind?

I’ve been thinking about this question for a few days before attempting an answer.

Currently, I don’t think that it is possible that any friends or associates can have a negative influence on my mind.

Just about all of the people I know are either neutral or positive influences, and I like it that way.

In the past, when I was much younger and much less selective in the people with whom I chose to associate, the answer would have been yes.

Over the decades, however, I’ve learned how to be more selective and I’m happy to say that I’m pleased with my friends and associates. They’re a great bunch of people and are supportive of each other, even when we have differing beliefs and opinions regarding things like politics, religion, and other issues that can be hot buttons for some people.

I’m happy to be part of such a tolerant and supportive group.

What about you?

Is it possible that some close friend or associate has a negative influence on your mind?

Act on your dream!

JD

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Think and Grow Rich test: Do you see any connection between your friends and some unhappiness in your life?

December 21, 2009 by JD · 2 Comments
Filed under: Books, Self-Improvement, Success and Failure 

My answers to the Think and Grow Rich Self-Assessment Test

Recently, I was reminded of the self-assessment test in Napoleon Hill’s best-selling book, Think and Grow Rich.

There are fifty-four questions in that test, and I’m going to be giving my answers and thoughts on one or two of them as close to daily as I can manage. I may miss a day here or there, but I’m going to follow through until I reach the end of the test.

I’ve started the series of posts with:

Think and Grow Rich self-assessment test

Question Number 39. Do you see any connection between your friends and some unhappiness in your life?

Finally, an easy question to answer succinctly.

No, I don’t.

In the past, I may have been able to say yes, but not now. I’m proud of my friends and happy with them.

What about you?

Do you see any connection between your friends and some unhappiness in your life?

All the best,

JD

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